How to regain confidence after job loss or job search disappointment


Let’s be honest, losing a job and then struggling to get an interview (or even to get past the first interview) over and over and over can feel absolutely defeating.

This is the case for many job seekers who consistently persist but get knocked back.

However, if we fall into feeling sorry for ourselves or succumb to feelings of being unwanted or unworthy, we only disservice ourselves further.

No one wants to hire a bad attitude.

So, what are some actions we can take to regain confidence and head back on our job search journey? Here are our top tips!

Fight against negative self-talk

Don’t take it personally. It’s easy to think, ‘what’s wrong with me?’ or ‘why does no one want to hire me?’. But you can’t take the process or rejection as a personal attack. When you start over-thinking about ‘why’, you can get deep into dark thoughts of uselessness or unworthiness. This is a sure-fire way to strip you of any confidence and motivation to continue trying to find work.

Instead, as you start to hear these thoughts arise, literally tell them to stop.

Think about people like Oprah, J.K Rowling, Walt Disney or even Elvis who all faced ‘failure’ in way of rejection, being fired and bad grades yet still became successful in the things they were told they couldn’t do!

Replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations like, ‘I can do this.’ And ‘I’m talented and hard working and I will find the right workplace who see’s my value!’

Stop dramatic thoughts

On top of negative self-talk other thoughts that can be extremely unhelpful are catastrophic or dramatic thoughts that often grow and grow until you can no longer see the light at the end of the tunnel. Worrying just breeds more worrying!

A good way to get those crazy things out of your head is to focus on being logical.

Take a break from your computer and go for a walk, do some exercise, find some clarity... then think about your possible next steps.

Making a plan can really help prompt logical thought, even if that plan is just for the day ahead. Taking it one step at a time is key to ensuring you don’t get overwhelmed.

Plan your finances

Planning your financial situation can be very helpful to ease your mind and stop catastrophic thinking around not earning. A new budget and lifestyle changes can help ease panic until you find a new job. It can also be motivating to know you have a goal, or you need to find a job before a certain time. Depending on your personal finance situation, consulting with a financial planner might help bring you peace of mind.

Check in with your support network

It can feel lonely when you’re out of work and everyone around you is employed. But don’t let shame set in. There is no shame in struggling to find work, almost everyone goes through this experience at least once in their life.

Let your network know you are looking; you can even ask for help if you feel you have that kind of relationship with someone you know. It helps to know people are looking out for you and that you might pop up on someone’s radar. You may even receive some handy tips around your resume, or LinkedIn profile by simply reaching out to a friend or old colleague.

Don’t find comfort in complaining communities

Don’t get stuck in a cycle of complaining. It can be easy to jump online and complain especially in forums or the comment section when others are also complaining. You may think ‘these people know what it’s like!’

By all means, it’s okay to vent to a friend or family member personally. After all, it gets hard and sometimes we just need to let out some steam. But getting stuck in a complaining spiral with strangers can pull you deep into a negative headspace, which as we know, does not help!

Avoid doing this all together and just keep to your supportive communities.

Don’t give up

Lastly, we know at times that it can feel like a losing battle. But it’s not! It’s not over, and you can do it. There are plenty of jobs out there, and plenty of people hiring. You will find the right employer. You never know, it could be the next job you apply for. Don’t stop trying. Remember, you have the capability, and your attitude could be what pushes you across the line!

If you are interested in securing the support of a career coach to help you with your journey, contact our Career and Change team today via career&

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